SHEILA

[aubins]

this is santa clarita diet, right?

Comments

week 2, friday

[aubins]

[ fuckin'...

IT'S THE BAR, SHEILA. HE'S AT THE BAR. he's having a drink, and frowning. i'm a master of top levels. ]

[toesies]

[your top levels are beautiful

Anyway! She's just going to plop down on the seat next to him and cradle her head in her hands.]

Yuuuuriii...

[aubins]

[ he's just going to pat her hair. ]

Hey Sheila.

[toesies]

[Thank you for these pats in these dark and trying times... She lifts her head enough to glare at the booze.]

If I find whoever killed my roommate, I'm going to kick their ass so hard that when they go use the bathroom, they'll have to shit through their mouth.

[aubins]

[ there's a pause and... you know? this is a shit situation, but he can remember luca well and truly complaining about his roommate and everything he was putting up with but...

well.

i, becks, am seriously hoping they spite adopted each other during these trying times because it brings me joy. i will not perceive any alternative like "oh no sheila was going to end him herself" ]

...

That's my priority tomorrow. Try not to have all the fun and save a little for me?

[toesies]

[More like Luca is an asshole but even some assholes don't deserve death, man.]

Don't worry. I'll leave enough for everyone else.

[aubins]

[ that sounds like adoption to me. ]

As long as no one shows up with a bar of fucking chocolate to distract us all again. [ god. ]

[toesies]

I don't think I'll be able to look at chocolate the same way again.

[aubins]

I recommend throwing them at things. It's very therapeutic.

[ ... ]

I'm still trying to wrap my head around why someone would go after Luca. Looking for an easy target...? He couldn't fight....

[toesies]

... I know. He was an asshole, but he didn't deserve to die.

[aubins]

Aside from the murder robot, did anyone? I'm not sure this place cares.

[ ... ]

Doesn't mean I don't agree though.

[toesies]

The entire premise does attract a lot of selfish douchebags, doesn't it?

[aubins]

"Fuck around and get whatever you want" isn't a sales pitch that normally attracts the selfless and caring.

[toesies]

Yeah, but you would have hoped it would attract less homicide enthusiasts.

[aubins]

You would, wouldn't you.

[ he just reaches over the bar and returns with


a bottle of wine. and pops it on the bar between then. they always end up drinking? ]

[toesies]

[stares at the bottle.]

We really should add a schedule to the bar.

[and then she grabs some glasses and starts pouring.]

[aubins]

What, so we can’t pretend we’ve been here less that we have?

[ can’t hide from your shame if your shame’s not documented. ]

[toesies]

No... It's just that we drink a lot on the weekends. And I don't blame us.

[aubins]

New rule -- no one's allowed to get completely drunk on a Saturday night, not after last week.

[ ... ]

You alright? Within reason.